He kept my heart, even there

Friend,

I’ve been quiet the last couple of weeks. No emails, no new posts. My husband was in the hospital, twice, and I was right there beside him instead of at my desk.

I’m not writing today to tell you the whole story. I’m writing because of something I noticed while I was sitting in those hospital chairs, waiting on doctors, waiting on test results, waiting on God.

My heart was at peace. Not because the situation was easy. It wasn’t. But because Philippians 4:6-7 turned out to be true in a way I’d only ever taught, not lived, quite like this before.

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7, NLT)

That word “guard” stood out to me this time. Not “give” peace. Guard it. Like a soldier standing watch over something worth protecting. God wasn’t handing me a feeling and hoping it would last. He was stationed there, holding the line, while the machines beeped and I couldn’t do a single thing to fix what was happening to my husband.

I know a lot of you are in your own version of that hospital chair right now. Maybe not a literal one. Maybe it’s a diagnosis, a marriage, a wayward child, a bank account that doesn’t add up. Whatever it is, I want you to hear this from someone who just walked through it, not someone theorizing about it.

He’s recovering well now, praise God. But he has another surgery coming in about six weeks with a longer recovery ahead, so if I go quiet again this fall, you’ll know why. I’m not telling you this to explain myself. I’m telling you because I want you to see that peace isn’t a one-time thing you get and keep. It’s something you have to receive fresh every time the fear tries to come back.

Peace isn’t the absence of the crisis. It’s Him standing guard in the middle of it, again and again, for as long as it takes.

If you’re in a season where you need that kind of ongoing prayer covering, that’s exactly what the Prayer and Scripture Collective is for. No pressure, just know it’s there.

Thank you for your patience with my silence these past couple weeks. And thank you for praying, if you did. It mattered.

Standing firm with you,

Karen